The Almighty Dreaded “Sorry”.
Been sorry :is a state of being regretful and admittance, been apologetic or grieved for a wrong action.
In my early years of life, I always believed in making and driving home my point in for or with whoever I argued or had issues with especially when I am absolutely sure that I am the right one in such instances, I was the queen of dragging conversations even when i know I was wrong and sure there is no way the issue will be viewed that I can ever be right on it but my ego will never want me to be great and my stubbornness would keep cheering me on. I will totally blank out on what my conscience is saying at that time about me been wrong and to do the honourable thing to make amends and say “sorry”,I would rather battle with my emotions and guilty conscience than say the ego breaking word.
But over time ,now I can even apologize for what I didn’t even do and go over board to apologize on someone else’s behalf.
I am sure people that knew the old me then are always stunned whenever I am quick to say sorry when my mistakes are pointed out to me and even more amazed with the way I say it freely.
I am sure at this point you are already wondering what changed and how did I get to this turning point so to say. Yes most definitely an event happened that changed my perspective forever for good, I had an issue with my dad and it really broke me, I felt grossily bitter and Offended, I took the bull by the horn that day which I would never do on a normal day and told him we needed to talk, I expressed my displeasure with teary eyes and I broke down all he did and how it made me feel but was not expecting anything I just did it to loosen up and get the issue off my mind, to say I was so surprised to hear him say “I am sorry, I didn’t mean it that way, I wouldn’t want to hurt your feelings ” not that he isn’t always apologetic but I was amazed that he accepted his mistakes and apologized to the tiny “me”, immediately d 50kg cement of anger was offloaded my chest and I became all smily immediately. Those words gave me a sense of belonging and opened my eyes to another perspective of life that what I struggle to say is what a man that I look up to and has much more than me said without battling an eyelid, it came out as easy and smooth as it may get. It was a turning point and a moment to ponder over what happened to think I almost lost something huge just because I wouldn’t say “sorry” and that was it for me and up until now I always have my apologies handy and put out when necessary.
For anyone reading this, Yes you that saying “sorry” has cost you your means of livelihood, love, recommendation, friendship, relationships since you have being holding on to it ,what has it brought or offered other than anguish, bitterness, loneliness, regrets and what have you and majorly “had I know ” when situations are no longer redeemable, so from a point of view of someone that has been in that place you are now,it’s only fair I point it out that saying ” sorry” isn’t ego breaking and hard to say like we assumed, it’s just as simple as you greeting someone and it costs nothing than you can offer or do away with.
You can do it, just inhale and exhale with eyes closed and push forth the word. That person you sincerely owe an apology and you feel it everytime, now is the time to pick up your phone, walk up to the person and say the “heartfelt sorry”, it never kills, say it, make that move and look at how much you can save yourself from. It’s time to rekindle that friendship, love affair, business connect that has being put on hold for a while, in the end it’s not about who is much stronger but it’s about realising you were wrong and bold enough to take responsibility to make amends .
Till I hear from you and you read from me again never forget “it’s never too late to mend the bridge”. Byeeeeee.